6 Easy New Year Resolutions

Breathe oxygen

That’s the good stuff. Some dandy ole diatomic oxygen. Good for the soul (and respiratory system). I highly recommend committing to this resolution at a near-constant rate. It’s important to have a good give-and-take method, to strike an even balance. Once you hit your rhythm, you’ll be surprised at how much clearer and stable your life becomes.

diatomic

Look, diatomic oxygen! Oooo, it’s a lewis dot, AND a 3d model!!

Sleep

Whether it’s catching some Z’s in the carpool or snoring into the fluffy drool-catchers we call pillows, the hottest resolution this upcoming year is definitely sleep. People everywhere are excited to dive into this fab trend. We’ve heard great feedback from people who tried this last year. Just check out some of the responses:

  • *snoring*
  • *drooling*
  • *snuggling a drool-catcher*
  • *mumbling* No I DON’T want to join the tea party!! *snores*
sleep

Sleeping is really just an excuse to become a pretzel.

Eat food

This is one of the most controversial resolutions of this year, but it’s catching a lot of support from all ages and demographics. “Eat food” is the mantra of the new year. We recommend you try to stick to this resolution at least 3 times per day. That’s a big scheduling time commitment, but you won’t be sorry!

food

This is a very green menu. We’re environmentally conscious here in the color department.

Sit Down

Chairs, sofas, cars, flat surfaces, tree branches, beanbags… people just can’t get enough of sitting down! In the terrible epidemic of “standing” that has plagued the recent generations, people are really going back to their roots with this resolution. The best part is that you can work this seamlessly into your current schedule! Sit in the car while driving to work, sit at a table while eating food, or just sit down and breathe! This resolution really is flexible and pairs nicely with many other resolutions and a nice white wine.

chair

This chair is purple because purple is the best color of ALL.

Talk or Whatever

Whether it’s a 2-word or 12-page text, a nicely worded email, a phone call, or a few terse words to the cashier who refuses to accept your yesterday-expired coupon, communication is key. This year, resolve to take that extra step. Make eye contact with a stranger, awkwardly wave at the person in the next car, say or type some words to people on The Interwebs. You won’t know how easy this is until you try! But it’s not for everyone, so make sure to think it through. Paying for groceries, commenting on a blog, saying HI to a relative… make this New Year something to remember!

talk

This is probably how 78% of my conversations go.

Finish at Least One Resolution

This is the ultimate self-fulfilling resolution. Check it off the list just to check it off the list, and you’re already one step closer to checking MORE THINGS off the list!!!

checklist

This is just a good idea.

All images in this post were made by yours truly*

*PS: “yours truly” is me**

**are you allowed to put a post script in a footnote?***

***probably

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4 thoughts on “6 Easy New Year Resolutions

  1. I was with you up until “talk” oooh, not sure about that. Though does this count? Leaving this message? If so, awesome 🙂
    Wishing you a great New Year

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